On September 19, 2008 I weighed 191.5 pounds at 5'1.5" tall and 58 years old. My highest lifetime weight was 252 pounds. I have lost weight (hundreds of pounds) using most of the commercial weight loss, nutrition and exercise products available, including but not limited to: TOPS, Weight Watchers, Diet Center, Opti-Fast, NutriSystems, LA Weight Loss, Atkins Diet, prescription diet pills, Curves, The YWCA, supplements, prayer, fasting, psychotherapy, "You On A Diet," Dr. Phil's book, Oprah's Boot Camp, and doctor-prescribed diets. And, something almost no one knows about me, and I am just beginning to tell people, I had weight loss surgery in 1981. I have done EVERYTHING to lose weight and solve my problem. Everytime I started a new plan I was enthusiastic and successful! For a while. Always I gained the weight back and reduced self-esteem with it. I did not know what my problem was!
The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous tells me that I have the disease of addiction, and even one bite for an addict will result in a relapse and the cycle begins again. This has been absolutely true for me - I qualify! I was defeated, dumb-founded, depressed, demoralized, and desperate.
What I learned in OA HOW is that my disease of food addiction and compulsive overeating is cunning and baffling, that the only solution is a plan of eating that leads to abstinence. Abstinence is Step Zero and following the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous is the path to freedom. I did not totally accept or understand this or believe I could do it. I thought the HOW program was rigid, inconvenient, and "over-the-top" --but I had no where else to go and nothing left to try.
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