"Life On Life's Terms"

So I’m better off if I don’t give advice, don’t figure I know what’s best, and just accept life on life’s terms, as it is today–especially my own life, as it actually is. Big Book p. 450

Today is a struggle to accept my life on life's terms. My sweet brother is gravely ill. Though clean and sober for 4 years, his liver failure was caused from his addiction to alcohol. Visiting him in the ICU is so hard. He cries and talks about how much he loves all of us and then I cry. I know he needs to be feeling all these feelings, and I am being with him through it. Then we laugh a while at memories and then we cry again. Today he talked about our Mom a lot -- just put me into a puddle. He is asking for everyone's forgiveness for "everything he put us through." I continue to pray for my own strength to be of service to him and keep doing "what we do" to follow my program. I am so thankful I have my abstinence and my program during this time, or I would be of no service to anyone. I would be raging in my own addiction, eating to medicate my feelings. He said through his tears today, "I thank God for you everyday, my angel." My gift to him is a direct result of my own program of recovery and I thank God everyday for that.